Coffee with Kimmy

So maybe, when it's all not so fucked up, I'll be able to breathe freely. Maybe when my world is not as dark as it is now,  I'll understand. Deep within this vast black hole in my heart, deep within the void, maybe there's still hope. Maybe you can still save me. Maybe when it's all not so fucked up anymore,  I will want to be saved too. And behind all the maybe's I just let out...there's a part of me begging the universe to turn the uncertainties and falsities into certainties and truths. Be still, my heart. Be still.

Just now, I read this article in "Preach It" page in Facebook. It's about the love which a person truly deserves. For me, the words are just too perfect and not posting it here in my blog is an offense to mankind. So...here it goes. The love you deserve will not send you mixed signals. Love will not take you out to dinner and have nice conversations with you ’til 5 AM only to send you home alone and never talk to you again. Love will not ignite false hopes, instead love will plant truthful hope and will commit to it. Love will not tell you bogus promises, instead love will do things you won’t even expect. Love will be clear and it won’t leave you wondering in confusion. The love you deserve will not be hurtful at all. Love will not leave you with scars or trauma. Love will not call you names. Love will not treat you like a piece of crap. Love will not be immature and childish. Love will not leave you crying yourself to sleep, feeling sorry about your...

I just read a book entitled "The Law of Moses" and in that book, the heroine names five greats everyday (*five greats= five best things that happened/she had). The purpose of the drill is for her to realize how blessed she is everyday and to remind her that no matter how shitty the day is, there are good things that happened so she still has to be grateful. I'm going to try naming five of my greats every day. So for today, here's my greats so far:  1. Sweet smile 2. old wooden tables and chairs 3. trees 4. rustic fence 5. ice cream To be honest, when I think of greats, I think of tons of things. Five isn't enough for all the good things that happens everyday. I thank God for giving me so much blessing everyday but sometimes, I forget to count them and to appreciate them. So through this drill, hopefully, I and you guys will realize how blessed we are and how lucky we are to be given a chance to live in this beautiful world. ...

And then, there are times like this.. when you feel like you're a princess in a fairytale story.  when you gravely want to believe that the prince and his version of 'happily ever after' is real. when you you're not scared to try again. when you're willing to take the risk. when you smile without reservations. when things suddenly become a little more colorful than ever.

Ohhhhh my heart. My poor poor heart. Can I get any happier than this? Maybe, yes?.... Universe, please say yes!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ The Way I Am | Ingrid Michaelson If you were falling, then I would catch you. You need a light, I'd find a match. Cause I love the way you say good morning. And you take me the way I am. If you are chilly, here take my sweater. Your head is aching, I'll make it better. Cause I love the way you call me baby. And you take me the way I am. I'd buy you Rogaine when you start losing all your hair. Sew on patches to all you tear. Cause I love you more than I could ever promise. And you take me the way I am. You take me the way I am. You take me the way I am.

Sometimes the cigarette burned for seven minutes. Other times, nine or ten.One thing that never changed, no matter how long the cigarette lasted, was how my shattered heart still found ways to break into even smaller pieces.

Novels are my life. They're my addiction. They're my go-to-bestfriends. You can just leave me with nothing but food, water, shelter and thousands and millions of novels and I'll live the happiest girl in the whole wide world. Or you can just leave me with nothing but books and I could die out of dehydration, starvation or cold but I'll still die the happiest woman on earth. No, no, no. I don't think you understand even a fraction of my addiction for reading novels. You see, reality is a bitch so whenever life hits me hard, with the speed it will take to bat an eyelash, I come running back to the greatest love of my life: novels. Of all the novels I've read though, for the longest time now, my favorite has been 'The Degradation Series' of Stylo Fantome. I can't tell you anything about my love for this series in this blog entry because there's just so many things to say and this entry is not about my love for Fantome but for another author...